Oh, if only it were that simple! Have I thought about it? YES! Can I make it happen? Sadly, no. If you can make it happen, sure you can be the star! Can you get Hugh Jackman as the leading man? Please!?
FAQ Category: What Not to Ask Lori
I have a really great idea for a story. If I tell you my idea and you write it, can we split the income?
Believe it or not, I’ve been asked this. More than once!
First of all, I have my own ideas, thank-you-very-much. Second, Lori splits income with no one! If you’ve got a great idea, write it. That’s the hard part, you know.
Maybe tomorrow. Maybe never. Odds are on the never.
There are many, many authors who’ve never made enough publishing 2 or even 3 books a year to quit their “day job”. There are some (very few) who were a huge success and made scads of money on their first book. This isn’t a union. We don’t all get paid the same. Talent is a very subjective thing. Some authors are going to be loved more than others.
Didn’t we go to the same high school/church/laundrymat/gas station way back when? Didn’t you base Story/Character X on me?
No! Okay, we might have gone to school or church together. But my characters are a figment of my oh-so creative imagination and are never, ever based on anyone I know.
Amazingly enough, many, many people ask me this. But come one people, I don’t know your sex life and I don’t WANT to know your sex life. I would never, ever think enough about your sex life to include you in a book. Ha!
Sometimes I steal a name because it’s a good name. Sometimes your name gets used because I forgot it was your name. Sometimes, if you’re a fun reader like Patti and Morgan and Barb, I’ll turn you into hookers in a book (The Secret Life Of Bryan) and we all get a good laugh!
No. Please don’t ask. Don’t even ask me to read your synopsis or your first chapter or even your cover letter.
I strongly believe that voice is the #1 thing that will get you sold. If I read your work and make suggestions, then my voice gets imposed on yours.
Also, I don’t have time. If I could fit 5 more hours in the day, I still wouldn’t want to read it, because when I have time to read, I want to grab a book out of my to-be-read pile and have some major fun. Not critique or edit. I leave that to editors, who know what they’re doing.
I can’t buy your book, and I don’t have an editor who loves me enough to buy a book that she didn’t love. So there’s really no point anyway.
I will wish you tons of luck, though!